last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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