Sponge bath it is.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Randomize
