Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
