I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
