so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
