I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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