I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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