Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Randomize
