69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
