Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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