You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
