I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
