Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Randomize
