He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Randomize
