How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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