i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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