please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Randomize
