My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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