Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you