Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
