Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
My pussy is not your playground.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
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