I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
its not stalking. its research.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
