You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
