I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
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