I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
