would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
27 Drunk People That Pissed Off The Cops And Got What They Deserved
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me