I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
