I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
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