Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
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