I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
