I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
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