he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Damn victory sex feels great
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
