Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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