I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Randomize