careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
thus making me awesome and them whores
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
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