My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
