my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Do you have feelings for this penis?