He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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