quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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