idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize