why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
