I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Girls should come with a carfax report
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
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