You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
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I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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