my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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