that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Randomize