does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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