I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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