OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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