So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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