Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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