do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
